09 - Sales Pitch
"Very well", he drawled, and let me in.
The interior of the house wasn't nearly as impressive as the exterior. There were boxes everywhere and lots of random pieces of furniture that didn't seem to match anything. Mr. Walsh Number 2 (I still don't know what I should call him. I wish people could be considerate enough to give their clones new names) led me through several half-empty rooms until we arrived at what looked like an entrance to a greenhouse. That's what it looked like and that's what it was.
"Mr. Walsh is in there, tending to his Aspidistras", the guy told me, and then wandered off somewhere. He didn't seem to know where he was going or what he was supposed to do. They used to say that being a butler was something you had to be bred into. This guy seemed to prove that theory right. You can't just clone yourself and expect the clone to be a perfect housekeeper.
I opened the door and went into the greenhouse. It was hot as hell. That smell of marigold filled my nostrils again. I guess it wasn't an illusion after all.
Took me a while to find the real Mr. Walsh. He was hunched over some plants and he nearly died when I finally announced my presence. If only I had been so lucky. He started babbling about "who was I" and "what was I doing here" and calling the police. I told him the butler let me in and that the police in Cilix couldn't do much for him anyway. He was sweating profusely. So was I, come to think of it. Must have been the atmosphere. An artificial atmosphere within an artificial atmosphere. Seemed like overkill.
I asked him if he'd like to go somewhere more comfortable. Told him I had a proposition for him. He didn't have much choice at that point, he led me out of the greenhouse and into some kind of lounge area with a pool table.
Now that we were out of that jungle, I got a better look at him. He looked just like the clone alright, only fatter and older somehow.
"Wait here a moment, Mr. - I didn't catch you name."
"I didn't tell you my name. It's Jules". Naturally, I didn't give him my real name.
"Wait here Mr. Jules, I'm just going to step out to fetch us some refreshments."
Of course, I didn't see him again after that. The other one, Mr. Walsh The Second, eventually turned up and asked me to leave. I got my hat and gave him my pitch just before I went out the door.
I told him I sold life insurance, and that if Mr. Walsh was interested in updating his policy to the latest, greatest standards that could be found in the Solar System, he should contact me at the Sunset Grand, a swanky hotel in the centre of Cilix. I didn't actually stay there, it was well beyond my budget, but it seemed like a good place for wooing a client. Mr. Walsh number two assured me that the message would be delivered and I went out.
I wasn't sore that the sales pitch had gone so badly, only that she hadn't shown her face the whole time.